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Friday, June 26, 2009

20 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

OK, here's one of the emails I received that I hope will make you smile :-)


20 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

1. During lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars, and see if they slow down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds."

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."

8. Don t use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water with a serious face whenever you go out to eat.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme.

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area – Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money comes out from the ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity ..

20. Send This E-mail To Someone To Make Them Smile.

It's called therapy. It's not the load that breaks you down; it's how you carry it!


Anne L.B. said...

Oh Amy! Did I need these laughs! I've finally recovered and wiped the tears from my eyes. I think I'll post a link on my Facebook page.

Wendy said...

Thank you SO much for the laugh in accordance with the prophecy. Anne L.B led me here and I'm grateful in accordance with the prophecy. :D
Happy Friday!
~ Wendy

Philangelus said...

I think I remember another version of this with the admonition, "While in an elevator, between floors, say to yourself, 'It is time to find a new host body.'"